Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
Randomize
