Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
