He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
Randomize
