guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
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