Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I know its only noon but, Im too drunk to hold this baby...
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Randomize
