To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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