You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I didn't shave. On purpose
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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