I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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