gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
