I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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