I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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