It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
