No awkward lesbian experiences without me
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
Randomize