P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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