would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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