i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
