I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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