so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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