I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
