yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
