Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
My dick has a subreddit
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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