Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
Randomize
