I'll bet she douches with gravy.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
