I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
