grandma shit on top of the toilet
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
