help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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