I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
