yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Randomize
