You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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