his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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