We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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