i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
You owe me 10 bucks. He wasnt in jail. Found him at 530 this morning when the smoke alarm went off. He passed out naked in the middle of cooking bacon. No idea where he was before that.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
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