Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
