Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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