Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
