It's Friday. Sex?
I feel great
I just peed on a car
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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