Dual....:-)
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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