Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Randomize
