Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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