so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize
