She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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