It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
He is married, and has a regrettably large penis. I need to find another one right away to get myself out of this mess.
How big does a penis have to be before it becomes regrettably so?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
