I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Last night, I accomplished the impossible. I pissed while riding my bicycle home without pissing all over myself. My Dutch friends gave me a round of applause and said I was now the king of holland.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
