Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
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