Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
