dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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