Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
