I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
