Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
