YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize
